Coffee is my New Ministry

Let me clarify that a bit: not making coffee, or serving coffee (although both of those are also wonderful ministries. Someone's gotta make the Sunday morning brew!) Having coffee is my new ministry.

I have to admit that for several years now I've felt as though something was missing from my volunteer ministry portfolio. Like many pastor's wives, I've done a gamut of jobs around the church. Some of them I've really liked (singing on a worship team for instance) and others, well.... not so much (leading a week of VBS for three and four year olds. Some people are really good with preschoolers. I am not one of those people.) In fact, there are many weeks when I've wondered why I don't just set up a bed in my husband's office. I spend so much time at the church that I think it would just be less trouble not to have to go home at night.

Yet I can't help but find it funny that even though I can spend hours and hours at the church "doing ministry," I often don't feel as though I've actually FELLOWSHIPPED with other people. I think the problem is threefold, at least for me:

1) Churches tend to be program-oriented: Aren't we all about our programs? Children's programs, youth programs, women's programs, men's programs, outreach programs.... the list goes on. And the bigger the church, the more programs there are. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in creating, executing and maintaining programs that we run out of time to just hang out with each other. We frequently find this to be true as a team of staff and spouses at our church: each staff member is so busy running his or her own programs that it's difficult to find time for us to get together just to have fun.

2) Tasks over people: Sure, we could fellowship with the people that we serve with in ministry. And sometimes I do. But the problem is that often when we are serving we are so focused on completing the task of getting the job done (cooking the pancakes for the men's breakfast, making prayer leaflets for the prayer team, keeping the Sunday School kids from coloring on the walls) that we really don't have time for quality fellowship with those with whom we are volunteering. (Have you ever tried to carry on a personal conversation with someone while counting the Sunday morning offering?)

3) Task-oriented personality: This is my major problem. Some people don't have this issue, but those like me who do tend to miss out on the most fellowship. My workaholic nature makes it hard for me to simply sit and drink coffee for an hour. It's hard for me to settle down when I know that there's work to be done, dinner to be cooked, homework to help with, etc. Who has time for coffee? And yet I know that spending time with people in a small and personal setting is crucial for developing and nurturing relationships. It is these core relationships that will strengthen the body of believers and the church as a whole. Doing church without building upon personal relationships is like constructing a house without a foundation.

Our church has gone through some rough times in recent months, and throughout it all I've found that it's been the personal relationships that I've developed within the church that have helped keep me going. I've had numerous coffee invitations in the last while, because people are reaching out and clinging to what is most important in a church when hard times hit: personal relationships.

There is good reason that the writer of Hebrews instructed us "Not [to] give up meeting together" (Hebrews 10:25.) I've come to believe that this applies not only to the assembling together of saints for corporate worship, but also to getting together one on one and with small groups to nurture and encourage one another. I am beginning to learn and appreciate anew how important it is to just take time to be with other people. I believe that "doing coffee" is as vital a ministry as any in the church.

Anyone else agree? Call me, we'll do coffee ministry together!